Teachers with higher emotional intelligence believe that meaningful interactions with students are key to effective teaching and better learning outcomes.
By Burcin Ogrenir, PhD
My exploration of social-emotional development in children and schooling began long before my PhD thesis, “Investigating the Relationships Between Emotional Intelligence and Preservice Teachers’ Views of Teacher Effectiveness” (Ogrenir, 2008). During the late 1990s, as a novice student researcher in psychology, I was deeply curious about what drives a student—or anyone—to commit acts of violence like school shootings. What was the missing ingredient in the shooter’s psychosocial history? This curiosity led me to focus on emotional intelligence, which encompasses skills such as empathy, emotional regulation, emotional expression, and social skills. Initially, my research centered on the emotional intelligence of students. However, recognizing the incredible influence of teachers on students, my PhD thesis shifted to examining teachers’ emotional intelligence and their understanding of teacher effectiveness.
One of my core findings in 2008 was that teachers with higher emotional intelligence were more likely to believe that their interactions and the quality of their relationships with students played a significant role in their teaching effectiveness. In other words, the better they connected and interacted with students, the better the students learned. This highlighted the critical importance of human connection in the learning process.
However, nearly two decades later, in 2025, we face discussions about reducing teacher involvement in education and, in some cases, partially replacing it with AI. Considering the rise in school violence, the decline in students’ mental health over the past decades, and the irreplaceable value of daily human interactions—especially in schools where students spend a significant portion of their time—this shift raises natural concerns and questions. As parents, educators, and society, we are rightfully curious about and cautious about increasing AI’s role in schools and daily life.
AI holds the promise of transforming social-emotional development in children by offering tools that personalize learning experiences, monitor emotional well-being, and increase accessibility. However, these advancements come with challenges, including privacy risks, biases, and the potential to replace human relationships with machines. It is imperative that parents play an active role in ensuring AI supports, rather than replaces, human components in their child’s emotional development. Ultimately, it is our collective curiosity, concern, and critical examination of AI in education that will shape its role in our daily lives, especially in schools and in shaping the future for our children.
How to Approach AI and Technology for Our Children
Connection: Everything when raising our children starts with our ongoing effort to connect with them. This connection begins in early childhood and evolves at every developmental milestone. A strong parent-child bond, built on trust and shared values, helps navigate challenges—including those related to AI and technology—much more effortlessly.
Communication: Open communication is essential. Make time to talk, laugh, and engage with your children in meaningful, screen-free ways. Whether it is playing a board game, going for a walk, or cooking together, these shared experiences strengthen bonds. Providing opportunities for children to socialize and engage in non-screen activities such as art, sports, and hobbies nurtures their creativity, builds social skills, and offers outlets for self-expression. Let children experience boredom, as out of boredom often comes creativity and innovative thinking.
Critical Thinking: Help your children question AI decisions and analyze the information they receive. For example, ask them why AI recommended a specific video or product and whether they think it is credible. Encourage curiosity about how technology works and foster a habit of investigating what is behind AI tools. Teach them to consider who created the tool and its purpose.
Accountability: Instead of strictly limiting screen time, involve your children in decisions about time management. Tailor these discussions to their age and maturity. Set up environments that naturally encourage balance. For instance, avoid placing TVs or gaming systems in bedrooms to reduce overuse. Teach children that screens and AI are tools for entertainment and learning, not substitutes for real-world experiences or human interaction.
Modeling: Stay engaged with your child’s use of AI and technology. Ask questions about what they are learning and discuss any misconceptions. Be transparent about the fact that even as parents, we are learning about this new landscape. Model how to seek reliable information and evaluate tools critically.
Advocacy: Push for transparency and fairness in AI development by engaging with schools, community groups, and tech companies. Request clear policies on how AI tools collect and use data. Advocate for developing safe, unbiased tools that prioritize children’s well-being over profit. Even as one family, your voice matters. Consistent advocacy for ethical AI helps foster broader change.
No matter how much AI develops, I cannot phantom a world where human interaction in school and daily life is effectively replaced with any technology. So, it is on to us. By fostering strong relationships with our children, providing them with opportunities for meaningful activities, and teaching them to navigate the digital world critically, we can help design a life for children where AI becomes a tool that enhances, rather than diminishes, their social-emotional development. ■
Dr Burcin Ogrenir, a family and parenting coach and the director of April Institute, specializes in child development, personal growth, family dynamics, and education. She pursued her graduate studies in clinical psychology and early childhood education from Penn State University. As a former assistant professor at the City University of New York, her influence reached international audiences through her teaching and scholarly presentations. Dr Ogrenir’s mission centers on serving diverse populations, making knowledge in child development, family relationships, and personal wellbeing accessible to all.
